She just calls me selfish every time we have one of our little “talks”. She says, “think about me some times. I went through A LOT of feelings this week with your bruise, work, and home”. She’s only calling me selfish because I wanted boyfriend to come over and like I’ve been saying, she’s not “ready” to see his face.

I still don’t understand why.

Was boyfriend your abuser? No. Was boyfriend the one who raped you? No. Was boyfriend the one who hit me? No. No one hit me. And he wouldn’t be the one if I DID get hit. So, tell me again why you can’t see him? Am I supposed to feel your bad feelings and horrible recollections with you? I didn’t live them. Boyfriend and I weren’t even alive at the time this happened. I understand that now you’re starting to remember them and all that, but that has nothing to do with MY boyfriend.

I will never understand. Maybe because I’m so selfish -.-

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